Natural Woman's Lament

Hi ladies,
At our friend Emily's birthday party awhile ago, me and friend Shay were having an interesting convo. Shay, who'd recently grown out her relaxer, was trying to understand why her folks at the swanky SoHo restaurant where she works thought it was okay to touch her hair. You know, "ooh, it's so soft!" "Do I look like the star animal in a petting zoo?" she wailed. We got to talking more about her hairdo, her favorite products, and other stuff I thought my SYB Babes would be interested in...especially those of you considering going the au naturel route. So I decided to introduce her to you guys with a Q&A. SYB Babes, Shay. Shay, SYB Babes. Discuss!

TIA: Okay, so tell us why you grew out your relaxer.

SHAY: I'd always admired the natural look. Plus, I got tired of having frizzy, unmanageable hair in the summer, even with a perm.  I got a pixie cut first, so it only took less than a year to grow out.

TIA: Smart girl. So, now that you've been relaxed AND natural, which do you prefer?

SHAY: I definitely prefer my natural hair! I have the best of both worlds.  I can wear it straight for half of the year and I have the option of wearing it curly for the other half.  Also, my hair is so much healthier!

TIA: I hear that. My split ends are so bad, my hair looks like it should be blowing across the American West. What’s your haircare regimen?

SHAY: I'm CONSTANTLY changing it. These days, I wet my hair daily, let it dry a little, and then massage in avocado oil, coconut oil, or olive oil while it is damp. Then, I use Miss Jessie's "scrunch and pull" technique and style with my fingers. My Dominican stylist got me hooked on Emergencia Conditioner ($10)...it keeps my hair so shiny and healthy. It's my secret weapon! I'm also a huge fan of Ouidad's products.

TIA: They don't call Ouidad the "Queen of Curl" for nothing. So, let's get right down to it. In an effort to keep it from happening again, explain to everyone why strangers petting your hair is weird and annoying.

SHAY: Don't get me wrong, it's flattering that people want to touch my hair! But most folks don't realize that having natural hair takes a lot of effort. It looks like I just woke up and rolled out, but my hair is actually styled. I'm constantly scrunching and pulling to make sure that it looks right. When my hair is straight, no one thinks twice about touching it because they respect the fact that it's been styled, and they don't want to mess it up.

TIA: I feel like next time I see you, you'll be wearing a tee shirt that says "Respect the Natural."

xoxo,
Tia

PS...What are your biggest hair pet peeves? Dying to know!

Liberian Curl

Hey ladies,
Wow. Michael Jackson. DEVASTATED. To answer what will for sure be the "where were you when..." question we'll be hearing the rest of our lives, me and my sisters were celebrating Lauren's birthday (Happy 28th, SisterWoman!) at a swanky restaurant. Almost immediately, everyone around us began frantically checking their Blackberries and I-phones, frantically texting and generally looking shocked. How can this be? I can't fathom that La Lina will grow up in a world without MJ...or worse, that she'll grow up in a world that'll remember him as nothing more than a clown-faced freakshow (at a loss for words, I relayed his significance by performing the entire Thriller routine for her). So sad. We love you, Michael! Don't stop till you get enough!

BTW, does anyone find it somehow meaningful that he died on the 25th anniversary of Purple Rain? I feel like there's got to be some significance there, but I don't know what it is.


Whatever it is, the show must go on. And that's exactly what last night's BET Awards did! At the eleventh hour, they switched up their entire run of show to allow for a passel of MJ tributes...and oh, they were so good. NeYo singing "Lady in my Life?" Smashed it. But of course, me being me, I was transfixed by a particularly sexy hair trend. Curls, curls, and mo' curls were popping up all over the red carpet, and I loved it!


What I loved the most was that the celebs proved that ringlets aren't limited to long hair alone. From Keri Hilson's sexy, hipster crop to Alicia's shoulder-grazing moment and Beyonce's looser-curled long locks, every length was represented. Equal opportunity curls, so ooh-la-la!!


Here's how you do it, whether your hair is itty bitty or down to your butt: Pile your hair ontop of your head, and pull down a small section, starting in the back. Spritz the section with a heat-activated conditioning spray (I love Frederic Fekkai Defense Thermal/UV Protectant Spray ($25)), to protect your hair from heat damage. Then, wrap the section around the barrel of a 1/2 inch curling iron like Hot Tools Professional Marcel Curling Iron 1/2 inch, $33 (for looser waves like B's, use a 1 or 2 inch barrel). But make sure the curling iron is CLOSED before you wrap your hair...this is key. Hold for no more than 10 seconds, then slip the iron out. Voila! A perfect, springy ringlet. After you've finished your entire head, shake it out with your fingers. The sexiness is ridic. Try it!
yours in curls,
Tia

PS...this is one of my FAVORITE hairstyles to rock, as evidenced by my author photo and any other pic of me taken at an important event. It's so much more, I don't know...WANTON than stick-straight hair!

The Dry Idea

Hey ladies,
Every summer, I get at least a dozen emails from my SYB Babes, asking me what to do about excessive facial sweating. You know, when your nose and forehead--or any other place on your face--seems to perspire all the time, and seemingly for no reason? I've never had a pithy response, though. Because honestly, until now, your options would be to use mattifying gels (not strong enough), take prescription pills (side effect-inducing), or get Botox injections (they totally work for excessive sweating, but who wants Botox if it's not absolutely necessary?). Well, a couple of weekends ago, a girlfriend of mine brought something BRILLIANT to my attention. DERMAdoctor Med e Tate ($48 for 30 wipes) comes with 30 individually packed towelettes soaked in a prescription-strength anti-perspirant forumula, each meant to be swiped over sweaty spots for instant and long-lasting dryness. Truth be told, I don't have an excessive sweating problem (technically called hyperhidrosis), but I wanted to see how it worked. Honey, I tried one of these on my nose before attending a very sweaty party, and I didn't so much as glow ONCE. I couldn't believe the results! Absolutely a must if crazy perspiration has been a problem for you. Plus, you can use it anywhere you want--behind the knees, under the arms, your palms, inner thighs. Anxiety-inducing interview or public speaking appearance, here I come!
xoxo,
Tia

Budget Monday: My Favorite Bushwacker

Hey ladies,
I am no longer getting my nether-regions waxed. Yet another thing I'm blaming on the economy. Most local spas charge around $65 to tend to my flower, and I'm sorry, but mama needs that cash to buy formula. Lately, I've been taking matters into my own hands with the brilliant new Schick Quattro for Women Razor & Bikini Trimmer ($12.99). This multi-tasking, all-in-one doohickie comes with four itty bitty blades that leave you post-waxing-smooth...PLUS a waterproof trimmer that, well, shapes everything up very nicely. I am loooving this. Get into it!!
Kisses,
Tia


PS:
You know that New York Magazine is one of my favorite publications, right? Imagine how flattered I was when nymag.com's Shop-a-Matic section asked me to choose my favorite fifteen lipsticks, glosses and stains of the season! Check out my picks here, and let me know what you think.

Do the "Lite" Thing

Hi Ladies,
So, I looove body butters. In fact, I consider myself to be something of a body butter connoisseur. One of my all-time favorites is Bliss Lemon + Sage Body Butter...have you tried it? Oh honey, this stuff is beyond dreamy. The scent is deliciously subtle (every time I catch a whiff of it during the day I smile a secret smile to myself, which I like to think makes me look enigmatic and mysterious), and the texture is luscious, rich, and lasts all day. In fact, the only negative thing I can say about it is that it's a tad heavy for summer. Since those Bliss Family Elves think of everything, they've just introduced the brand-new Bliss Lemon + Sage Body Butter Lite ($29), an airy, lightweight version of their bestselling Body Butter! How brilliant is this? And even though it's less dense than the original, it still moisturizes like crazy and lasts forever. So, the ashies are vanquished but you don't feel like you're coated with Crisco! Love that. I also love that you get a free Hanky Panky thong ($21 value) with every purchase of a Bliss Lemon + Sage Body Butter Lite...just enter "HANKY" at checkout!
Big kiss,
Tia


PS...
Happy Father's Day!! Still haven't figured out a gift? You can't go wrong with Kiehls. Even the butchest husband will love Kiehls Men's Travel Kit ($24.50), which is packed with tiny versions of all their Men's bestsellers. And in my experience, everybody's middle-aged dad is a sucker Polo by Ralph Lauren EDT Spray ($62.50), an overwhelmingly masculine blend of leather, patchouli, and wood (so Marlboro Man!). On a budget? Skip the fragrance and spring for the Polo by Ralph Lauren Deodorant Stick ($17)...it smells just as "grrr" as the cologne, but it's a fraction of the price. And what man couldn't use another stick of deodorant?

New, Blue, Fabulous

Hey ladies,
I'm am sooo tired of bikini bumps (I accidentally typed "bikini bums" and had visions of down-on-their-luck sexpots begging for spare change on some gritty boardwalk). It doesn't matter if I wax or shave! No matter what, I always get a few, supremely annoying bikini-line bumps that never seem to go away. I've used Tend Skin for years, and it works, but it smells like a geriatric medicine cabinet and really brings me down, man (tiny disclaimer: I totally recommend it for be-razor-bumped guys, though. They don't care about scent as much). For years, I've been searching for something less clinical and unsexy-smelling to help me with my, um, little flower. Guess what? Found it! Shaveworks The Cool Fix ($25) is new, blue gel that obliterates ingrown hairs, razor burn, redness, the whole enchildada, mama. Shave bumps happen when hair gets trapped underneath the skin, attracting bacteria and excess sebum. The Cool Fix is loaded with powerful exfoliants that clear out clogged pores and liberate trapped hairs...and prevents new bumps from occurring in the first place! And it doesn't just work on the bikini line...my girlfriend has rough, bumpy patches under her arms, and The Cool Fix cleared it right up. All this, and it smells and FEELS heavenly, too. You better not go to Turks & Caicos without this blue miracle gel, sexy.


Speaking of stuff that's blue and genius (I know, a stretch)...do you know any tweens? If so, you must give them with the newest middle-school-age literary sensation, Mackenzie Blue ($8.61)!! It's a totally brilliant, totally smart story about a seventh grader who's having a really bad day. Her BFF moves away, someone steals her diary and reads it to the whole class, and she blows her big chance to be a rock star! Ladies, it's the cutest story, and the multi-cultural cast is to die for. Point your niece or daughter in the direction of the fantastic, interactive website, too: www.mackenzieblue.com. Oh, and did I mention that this book was the brainchild of my darling friend and Buzz Marketing CEO, Tina Wells?!! Congrats, lady!!
xoxo,
Tia

Budget Monday

Hey girls,
Yesterday me, Sunshine and La Lina had our very first professional photo shoot! Our friend
Wyatt Gallery, award-winning photographer and lover of ladies (preferably of Trini descent) shot us, and the pics are too brilliant. But I was worried the whole time about my hair. I mean, OBVIO. I haven't had a trim since before my daughter was born, seven months ago. And it shows. Here's the thing, though...I shouldn't have worried, because I looked at the images in Wyatt's camera and my split ends were virtually undetectable. For two weeks, I'd prepared for this moment by using Pantene Pro-V Split End Prevention Leave-In Cream ($4.99). The directions say to use it on wet hair, but I only wash my hair once a week and decided my split ends called for more than a once-a-week treatment. So, I applied the cream to my ends every night...and the results are amazing! Not only did it somehow smooth down my frayed edges, the leave-in is loaded with moisture, so it makes my hair look super-glossy. After only fourteen days, my hair looks better than it has in MONTHS! And for only $4.99! Cheers to that.
xoxo,
Tia